Letter to My 16 Year Old Self

by Delilah

I was tagged by thekillromeoproject on this ‘letter to your 16 year old self’ business started by RD.

Well here goes…

Dear 16 year old Delilah,

So you must be busy running around with that floppy haired boy you met last year huh? The one you swore to love forever and ever. Well, there’s something about him that I always wanted to ask you.

What the hell were you thinking???!!! Seriously.

Still I’m sure you’d like to know where it’s going, so let me tell you. He will over the years develop a fake American accent, barely scrape through college and will literally bore you to tears. 6 years from now you will leave him and never look back. I could tell you to walk away now and save yourself the heartache, but I’m not going to because it won’t kill you.

As for love, you will find it. More than once.  

You’d be surprised to hear that the friends you would give your life for at 16 will be lucky to get a phone call from you in time. They will be scattered all over the world and you will make new friends, which is not a bad thing at all.

Parents will be parents. And yours will never change. Enjoy all your escapades. What they don’t know won’t hurt.  I can assure you that you will not get caught. If ever you do, just use your head or your brother and you will surely get away with murder. But please don’t sneak out and go to a batch party on the 9th of September 1999 because you father will turn up on the dance floor and say ‘Get in the car. Now’. So not cool.

Education is good. Try and get it while your parents are paying for it. It’s not like you have anything better to do anyway except hang on the phone with that boy (and we both know how that turns out).

Oh and you know that dream job of yours? It will trap you, drain you and drive you crazy. But it will also become your career, your passion, your life blood. So all in all, good choice.

Now, could you please stop staring in the mirror, loathing your non-existent ass because you will eventually fill those jeans with a vengeance. Also, that cup size 30A will soon be a distant memory.

I know you are at that curious age so yeah, sex is a good thing but it really is true, the first time does hurt like hell. After that it’s as good as chocolate. Well almost.

I also feel compelled to tell you that your mother lied, periods don’t get any easier. But Sri Lanka will discover Whisper with wings.

One thing that won’t change over time is your taste in music and believe it or not you will actually meet someone who listens to the same stuff. Your precious walkman will be replaced by a tiny magic box called an iPod and you should keep an eye out for a fascinating thing called YouTube where you can find almost any music video. But then the internet is a whole other kettle of fish.

Speaking of fish, no you never will develop a liking for it but would you believe me if I told you that someday you will pay extravagantly to eat raw fish?

I simply must tell you something about alcohol. Football world cup 2006, stay as far away from the vodka as you can. You will learn the hard way that Bacardi makes you ill and Tequila makes you emotional. Just thought I’d give you a heads up.

You know how all these safety advertisements and your parents tell you to wear your seatbelt? Wear it. It might be the only thing saving you from a ten foot long steel pipe that comes through the windshield.  

So yeah, that’s about it. I’m afraid I haven’t done a lot of growing up since I was 16 and there aren’t too many things I would want you to change because I quite liked my life the way it was.

Cheers!

And I hereby tag

The Gutterflower

Love God Jack Point

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